Letters with Laikyn

Letters From Laikyn

Therapy. Say it with me….THER-a-pee. Merriam-Webster defines it as “therapeutic treatment especially of bodily, mental, or behavioral disorder” with synonyms listed as “antidote, corrective, curative, cure-all, answer, solution, panacea”. 

I believe in the definition, but not the synonyms. It’s not a one-stop shop where your nervous system is hooked up to a machine that can diagnose all the details of your life on a finely printed piece of paper, listing the cost to repair or replace each part. Instead, you are your own mechanic, wringing your oil covered hands against a used towel as you nervously consult a manual (or YouTube) as you tweak, and change, and tighten, and batten down whatever is loose within you. Now all that work doesn’t guarantee that you will ride out the storm every time. With each deluge comes damage, and dents, and dings, and scratches, but most important are the things not visible to the eye. Belts are whining, and pads are squealing, and liquids are drained. Once again, you get out that towel, pop the hood and dedicate time to see what’s happening on the inside. 

The definition of therapy for me is “for the betterment of the innards.” My synonym for it is “hope”. I hope that by using this tool, I will learn to speak to myself kindly, to treat myself respectfully, and to trust my gut. In turn, I hope I will then speak to others kindly, treat them respectfully, and trust the ones I love. This therapy is not an easy process. It’s hard and dirty and beautiful and brutal and frustrating and  a run on sentence of adjectives that never stop. But it has saved my life. In full disclosure, I use therapy with other modalities, and as with any such treatment, each plan is individual. I encourage you to look inside the Kelly Blue Book of your heart and find your worth. 

In this world of social smedia (that was actually a typo, but I’m going to keep it, because BEST SUBCONSIOUS DESCRIPTION EVER) it’s easy to fall prey to the idea that older, imperfect models can’t be fixed, and trading in for an upgrade is the easy way.  I won’t speak for you, my friends, but I have no interest in “easy”.  I am interested in the man in the arena. 

A quick history lesson folks….On April 23, 1910 Theodore Roosevelt gave his “Citizenship in a Republic” Speech, which states in part….

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly”.

For those starting out in the self help world, I recommend books by Brene Brown, PhD. For those too busy for books, I recommend audiobooks by Brene Brown PhD. But only if they are read by her…she has a sweet, southern drawl and a laugh so infectious I can’t help but laugh with her. They aren’t heavy, but carry some serious truth bombs. For those ready to dig deeper, I recommend One Wellness and Counseling….because the credit belongs to the man in the arena. 

Love and light, 

Laikyn

P.S.- Also full disclosure, I don’t know SHIT about cars. Any error in the analogies above is fully mine, and I don’t know that YouTube is better than a mechanic.