November 17, 2013- Coping After the Storm

It was a Sunday with a high wind warning.

What seemed like moments, it was here and than it was gone. Not before leaving a path of destruction.

It was not only a path of destruction of homes but displacements of lives.

Whether you lost your home or not, you knew not just one person but many that did.

If you talk to some of the people who lost their homes it went from shock to salvage to adjusters, finding a place to live, fulfilling basic needs.....picking up the pieces.

So what do you do from here?

Here are a few tips for yourself and your children in the attempt to regain a sense of normalcy.

1. Break things down into manageable pieces. Not only for you children but for yourself. Life on a good day can be overwhelming. Make sure you are not setting yourself up to be stressed out.
If you are a lister, no more than three things on your do to list at any given time.
Putting more on a list than you know you can handle at any given point is a set up.

2. Allow yourself time. A lot has been in the media about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. What people may be experiencing now is called an Acute Stress Reaction. That is considered "normal" for the first 4 to 5 weeks after a traumatic event. If you find that you or your child are experiencing prolonged symptoms past the five week mark that would be the appropriate time to seek out a mental health professional .

3. Be consistent. Even if you pick one thing a day to be consistent about with yourself or your children. We all crave some sort of routine and structure. Eat dinner together or get back into your work out routine.

4. Understand that creating your new normal is going to take time, adjust and learn new coping skills to help cope with your new normal.

5. Be aware that every one reacts and processes traumatic events differently. You or someone you know may be acting out of character but no one can say for sure how they will act under extreme stress or life altering situations.

6. Be factual. Children ask questions they are emotionally ready to hear the answers to. We as adults want them to understand and so we tend to over explain. Before you respond to a question think about what they are aksing you.

7. Everyone has a different tolerance level and copes differently. In the context of a relationship or in a family there needs to be enough tolerance so that everyone can process and cope in their own way.
If you feel like things are off with the ones you love, talk to them about it.

When something like a natural disaster or a life altering event happens you start off in survival mode (what do I need to do to provide for my basic needs, food, clothing, shelter, money, identification etc). After survival mode, which we are all starting to come out of, you become exhausted from handling the logistics of everything that needs to be tended to (mail pick up, canceling utilities, cancel trash pick up, etc). These tasks are physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting.

Self care is extremely important. Take breaks from it, eat right, get rest, do something fun and completely non related to what has happened. It is okay to "check out" of life for a little while as long as you "check back " in.

If you find yourself pulling away from others that is the time to reach out to others, widen your circle and let people in.

If you find that after the 4-5 week mark you are still have symptoms that are bothering you or disrupting your lifestyle or causing conflicts in your relationships that would be the appropriate time to talk to a mental health professional.

Jori Sparry is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Her expertise includes working with traumatic life events, post traumatic stress disorder, marital and family issues, blended family issues, divorce, infertility, families with multiples, depression, anxiety, and with military service members and their families.

Parenting Adult Children

Parenting Adult Children

As a counselor I am often helping people figure out how to manage relationships in their lives.  One of the trickier ones seems to be between adults and their parents.  When you picture having kids you picture babies and small children.  We often forget that these little beings turn into adults someday and yet are still your kids.  

This relationship can be difficult on both ends.  Those in the 20s, 30s, and 40s have certain wants/needs when it comes to relationships with their parents.  Those in their 50s and beyond are trying to figure out the line as well.  Throw some grandkids into the mix and it can seem like a mess at times.

So what are some of these big issues and the best ways to handle them?  Well the Facebook status on this one would read…it’s complicated.  But let’s sort through a few common struggles.

1. My adult child moved back in after college and is driving me crazy….what do I do?

This is happening all too frequently these days with the economy making it tough for new grads to find a job.  I think a good rule of thumb on this one is to sit everyone involved down and set some clear rules and expectations.  The topics you want to be crystal clear on are how long your child can stay and what you expect them to contribute (rent, bills, chores, groceries ect.).  Make sure everyone is in agreement on this and I would suggest even writing up a little informal agreement for everyone to sign.

1. I want to spend time with my grandchildren but my kids are asking me to babysit them all the time.

This comes up frequently in sessions.  Parent of young kids of course would love all the help and much needed breaks they can get.  Grandparents have different wants/needs on this one.  A good idea is to have all the adults involved sit down and discuss everyone’s wants or needs.  Grandparents, be clear about how often you are willing to help out with the Grandkids and how long (2 hours, an overnight here or there ect.)  Remember parents are exhausted and looking for some breaks, so it is great to help.   Parents need to remember that Grandparents have a life too.  It may not be their dream come true to spend countless hours with your kids.  That does not mean they do not love you all.

1. I do not like the way my adult children parent their kids.  What should I say or do?

Bottom line on this one is that it is the parents’ job to decide how to parent their kids.  If you have major concerns about your grandkids well being then yes you should talk to your adult child in private about your concerns.  Otherwise it is often best not share your opinion unless you are asked.   

1. When the Grandparents babysit, they don’t follow my rules?  It takes me a week to undo the spoiling.

Its true Grandparents love to spoil kids!  And sometimes they find your rules silly and unnecessary.  However can you really complain about free babysitting when you really needed that night out or overnight with your husband?  Again this is about open communication.  If you REALLY feel that the grandparent(s) behavior is going to harm your child in some way then sit down and talk to them.  If they are unwilling to change then you may consider limiting time or being there to supervise during visits.  However if it is just some good old fashion grandparent spoiling…consider lightening up a little.  Ice cream for dinner on occasion never hurt anyone.

Grandparents can be a wonderful support system and an important part of your child’s life.  All too often I hear of parents withholding time from grandkids over disagreements and hurt feelings about the above mentioned issues.  This is so devastating for everyone involved.  If you are struggling with these issues try to all sit down together and talk as adults.  Come up with a plan that meets everyone’s needs.  Or consider having a counselor help you and your family come up with a good plan.

Maggie Bagley is a licensed clinical social worker who has extensive experience working with children with Autism, ADHD, anxiety and behavioral disorders. She is a therapist and owner at One Counseling and Wellness.

Healthy Halloween Treats To Try for Kids This Year

Trick or Treat

Our holidays always bring along candy and sweet treats which come with lots of sugar, high fructose corn syrup and fat. You can take initiative to change this trend around by including goodies that make great healthy treats and also include Halloween gifts that kids will love.

*Some facts about treats

Did you know that about $1.9 billion of candy is sold each Halloween of which ~$1.2 billion is chocolate= 598 million pounds of candy= 1280 billion calories. 

Here are a few Healthy and Fun Alternative Treats to try this year:

• Cheddar flavored cracker
• 100% Fruit snacks or leathers
• Sugar-free gum
• Animal-shaped crackers
• Mini rice cereal treat bars
• Cereal bars made with real fruit   
• Individual fruit cups
• Mini 100% fruit juice boxes
• Low-fat pudding cups
• Pretzels

  

Pass out Other Kinds of Treats

• Jelly bracelets
• Fake teeth or wax fangs
• Jump ropes
• Eye ball bouncy balls
• Temporary tattoos or stickers
• Small containers of modeling clay
• Bubbles
• Erasers, coloring pencils or crayons
• Plastic spider rings
• Small Halloween-themed notebooks
• Noise makers or whistles

Candy defense 

• Consider not buying candy 
• Don’t open the candy too early
• Establish limits
• Portion control 
• Make candy trades by finding things your kids want more and switch out for the candy
• Don't leave candy in plain sight 
• Be mindful 
• Donate extra candy
• Host a Halloween party

Strategies for hosting a Halloween party

• Focus on more (active) fun, less on food
• Pumpkin carving or painting contest 
• Dance/limbo/Thriller dance 
• Relay races while “riding” a broom or three-legged zombie races 
• Scavenger or treasure hunts
• Host a haunted house 
• Spooky charades
• Visit a haunted corn maze

Have a healthy, safe and happy Halloween.

Mayuri Rangdal, MS, RD, LDN

One Counseling and Wellness

309-444-1000

12 Years Later

I remember almost every detail of that day with amazing clarity 12 years later. Not only do I remember that day but I remember the days and weeks that followed.

It was a beautiful day on the East Coast, picture perfect with clear, blue skies. The temps had dipped a little and you were starting to feel the crisp air of Fall.

It was in the morning and I was on my way to work, stopping by my weekly treat of Starbucks coffee. I got in the car and when the radio came on there was confusion of what was happening in New York.

The information was spotty. I remember picking up my cell phone to try and call my parents to see if they could tell me what was going on. The cell phones were jammed, you could not get a call through.

I drove the rest of the way to work and when I got to work everyone was huddled in a small room on a TV that had no cable and as we moved the rabbit ears to try and make out a fuzzy picture. It became clear what was happening.

There were no phone calls going out and none coming in. It was quiet everywhere. When you walked outside and looked up there were no planes, no noise, it was eerie. The quiet was extremely unsettling.

I worked at a partial hospital program at the time and I remember having a conversation later in the day how to talk to the kids about what happened that day. I remember sitting in that large group with a crushing feeling trying to tell the youth of that day that things were not good but that they would eventually be okay.

Would it ever be okay?

Up until that moment, up until that day I don't ever remember a time before when I felt scared to be in this country. Our country.

I remember those days and weeks that followed, I remember being glued to the TV until I physically and emotionally couldn't watch anymore.
I remember working really hard to understand something that I knew in my soul I would never understand.

Those days and weeks as American Flags were hung from every overpass in Connecticut, to large amounts of cars moving over on major interstates allowing lighting equipment and heavy machinary to pass because everyone knew it was headed into the city.......to help.

I remember watching the pain of many families that were searching for their loved ones and holding out hope. Sick with worry, physically sick with worry......

Going to the vigils and being in large groups of people and feeling completely alone.

September 11, 2001 was a horrible day for not just thousands of people but millions of people and the ripple effect of that one single day is still being felt 12 years later and probably will be for years and years to come.
However, in my world there was one other day that I feel was harder that September 11, 2001.

That day was September 12, 2001 when the sun rose......and life kept going....

Jori Sparry is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Her expertise includes working with traumatic life events, post traumatic stress disorder, marital and family issues, blended family issues, divorce, infertility, families with multiples, depression, anxiety, and with military service members and their families.

Soak in the Small Things!

The Not So Small Things

Much of my career has been spent working with people with serious medical conditions - new traumas and chronic conditions.  I have been reminded continually how precious life is, and to embrace every person, every moment.  My patients and clients have inspired me and I'll share one with you.  

He had been in a coma for 2 weeks.  Then completed  2 months of rehabilitation.  He Learned how to walk again, bathe himself, feed himself, dress himself, tie his own shoes. I was there in the hospital room when he first started responding to to commands / coming out of the coma.  And 2 1/2 months later, I watched him walk out the doors with his family.  At the time of our outpatient meeting, he was a few months in to a very long journey.  Being able to drive or work again was in the distance, if ever.  He walked with a cane and struggled with a field cut in his vision.  His speech was slurred and he struggled with finding the right word he wanted to say.  His short term memory was very poor.  He wasn't allowed to supervise his young child alone.  Life had been turned upside down.  He'd lost "everything" in the eyes of outsiders. 

 But when I asked him to describe his mood, he used the words "thankful, blessed, and happy". He expressed that he gets to watch his little girl play.  He gets to walk to the mailbox and get the mail.  That was a big deal to him, as there was a time in the hospital that he didn't think he would ever be able to do any of those things again.  He wasn't going to wait until he was "better" to take in life.  He chose to take and enjoy each moment.

Unfortunately, it often takes a tragedy or trauma for us to find that deep appreciation for "the small things".  But it doesn't have to.  Make  a conscious decision to be truly present in every moment.  There's a lot of truth and depth to the classic "stop and smell the roses". Because when you add up all the small things, it equals a lifetime.   So make it a point to go barefoot in the grass.  Eat more Popsicles.  Notice more sunsets.  Laugh as much as possible. Take it all in.

"Life moves pretty fast. If You don't stop and look around every once in a while, you might miss it."  

                                         - Ferris Bueller

Tammy Lott is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor who has 15 years of counseling experience. Her areas of focus include: medical psychology, adjustment to disability, migraine and tension headaches, conversion disorder, stress management, anxiety and depression.

Muscle Knots!

What are muscle knots?

Muscle knots also called myofascial trigger points are a common problem for people. These knots can range from the size of a pinhead to the size of your thumb. Muscle knots are sections within a muscle where contracted fibers are unable to release, creating pain. Unable to release means the muscle never relaxes, the muscle is always in a state where it appears to be in active use rather than passive use. Muscle knots can cause pain in two ways: 

1.  Latent trigger points, which are knots that only hurt when you put pressure on them.

2.  Active trigger points, which are knots that actively refer pain along your neural pathways; causing it in non-localized areas. 

What causes muscle knots? The most common causes of muscle knots are:

1. Accidents – acute trauma, such as bad falls and sports injuries that strain your joints and muscles.

2. Postural stress – sitting too long with poor posture, sitting with no support, and lifting improperly.

3. Overstimulation – strenuous exercise and sport activities, especially lifting weights. 

How can I treat muscle knots?                                                                                                        

If you do have a painful knot, you’ll be glad to know it can get treated. You can go see a licensed massage therapist, who can use different techniques to treat the trigger points. You can also do self treatment. Massage yourself with a tennis ball or a foam roller. Just remember whatever you do, muscle knots don’t form over night and won’t go away over night.

Melissa Foster is a licensed massage therapist; she is part of the Wellness team at One.

What Herbs Have to Offer

It’s that beautiful time of season again when we all get out our houses and start planning for our gardens. Does not matter if you are planning a vegetable patch or planning to plant in a pot, herbs always make great choice for gardeners. You can enjoy the fresh aroma and taste and along with tons of health benefits that comes from fresh herbs. If you are wondering which one is the best, I would say they all are good ones. They all are lower in calories and have great health benefits.

Basil: Sweet basil is low in calories, and is a good source of vitamin A. Basil seeds in particular, is high in dietary fiber. Basil also includes flavonoids and antioxidants.
The flavor of fresh leaves is outstanding in salads (greens, tuna, potato, egg), with fresh or cooked tomatoes, with eggplant, peppers or zucchini, in marinades, as a sandwich garnish, and in the classic pesto sauce for pasta. Cooked briefly, it is a flavorful addition to soups, stews, and sauces. It works well with most other herbs. Large leaves can be torn, chopped or minced, and small leaves can be added whole to salads, vegetable dishes, pasta and rice. To insure best flavor, add to salads and cold dishes soon after cutting and to cooked dishes in the last few minutes of cooking. 

Oregano: In folk medicine it is used to treat colds, coughs, gastrointestinal problems, has antibacterial, antifungal, antimicrobial properties. Oil is used to scent soaps, lotions and cologne. 
 It also includes the flavonoids. Fresh and dried leaves of oregano can be added to soups, casseroles, sauces, stew, stuffing, eggs, olives, teas, tomato-based dishes, chili and pizza. Flowers have a flavor similar to the leaves and can be a flavorful and decorative addition to vegetables, salads and other foods.

Dill: Dill water, or “gripe water,” is an ancient remedy that has been used by mothers for centuries to calm colicky babies or to help them sleep. Today, recent studies are bearing out the belief that dill is a useful remedy for indigestion and ulcers. Dill is also believed to have anti-cancer properties. 

Thyme: Thyme has many uses in chicken broth or stuffing; in clam chowder and marinades for meats or fish; in sauces; with onions, carrots or peas; in egg dishes with other sweet herbs; even in a baked apple dessert. The flavor can be captured in oils or butter. Thyme has been used since ancient times for its antibacterial and antifungal properties (it was one of the Egyptian mummification herbs); it was used as a fumigant and as temple incense and medicinally in many ways. Today, the essential oil thymol is used extensively in mouthwash, toothpaste, and anti-rheumatic ointments.
These were some the commonly used herbs along with Parsley, sage, chives and rosemary. Does not matter if you are getting your herbs from garden or from stores, herbs are a great way to make your meal extra special.

Note: Using herbs in supplement form may have adverse reactions or may interact with your medications, so check with your doctor before taking any supplements.

-Mayuri Rangdal, 
 MS, RD, LDN.

Mayuri is a registered dietician who work at One. With years of experience she helps clients who are trying to achieve weight loss and overall better health. See our website at www.onecounselingandwellness.com to learn more about Mayuri and all of our providers and services. 

What Kind of Adult Do You Want to Be?

What Kind of Adult Do You Want To Be?

You always hear the question posed to younger kids, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

I love hearing kids answer that question, I also love when adults ask themselves that question when they are thinking about making a career change or a life change in general. 

One question I feel that we are not posing to the youth today is “What kind of adult do you want to be?”

When I do ask kids that question sometimes I get answers like “I want to make a lot of money.” “I want to live in a big house.” “I want to drive a nice car.” I remind them that those are things they want to accomplish, those are not the things that will define them.

We ask the question of what they want to be but that is a very different question than “Who do you want be?”

When you ask a person who they want to be they have to think about what type of characteristics they want to instill in themselves, what interactions they want to have with others, what are their core values and what do they want their life here to represent. 

What you do in your job doesn’t always define who you are. It is important to look at all the different roles in your life (Mother, Son, Daughter, Husband, Father, Spouse, Friend, Sibling). Who are you in those roles and how do you tie those different roles into being the person you are the represents your core set of values.

When I was little I remember people asking my parents “What do you want your kids to be when they grow up?” I remember my parents saying “All we want is for them to grow up to be nice people.” WOW! I am glad I didn’t know at the time the magnitude of that expectation at the time. 

However, that expectation of being a “nice person” was always in the back of my mind. I always knew what I was going to be when I grew up but that statement force me to think about who I wanted to be. 

What kind of person did I want to be? I thought about all the things I wanted to be and than figured out a way to be them. Achieving some of those qualities were harder than others. I still work on the ones that still feel like work for me!
It is hard to respond to people who are being reactive to you.

Making a decision that you are going to be a responsible adult financially, emotionally and otherwise is difficult but it is just that, your decision.

What kind of adult you want to be is like any other major decision that you have to make over the course of your life. Sometimes it seem impossible to see the other side when you are trying to decide the right thing for you to do. Sometimes you have to try hard, sometimes you have to leap, sometimes you have to let go and sometimes you have to make your decision and never look back.

I believe in a balance of letting life’s experience shape you and deciding for yourself who you want to be, the place you want to be in people’s lives and the mark you want to leave on the world. Don’t just let life happen to you, make sure that you are participating in the process.

Jori Sparry is a License Marriage and Family Therapist at One Counseling and Wellness. 

  

Get Unplugged!

Get Unplugged!

We all know that children and adults today are spending too much time in front of screens whether it’s TV, computer, video games or phones.  I found myself having a bit of a panic attack recently when my own phone went missing for a half an hour.  A common nightly occurrence in many households is everyone being in front of a screen of their choice (IPAD, laptop, phone, TV, video game).  So how important is it to unplug your family and get everyone outside?

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children ages 0-2 have NO screen time and children older than two are limited to two hours of screen time a day.  So what is the research telling us are the effects of too much screen time?

Kids need to play, socialize and explore their environment in order to physically and mentally develop.  Screen time interferes with this important development. Also children who spend too much time in front of screens are more likely to be or become obese.   Watching television on a regular basis (even cartoons and G rated shows) exposes children to unhealthy amounts of violence, risky behaviors and disrespectful language and behaviors.  

Older children and adolescents also have a lot of added pressure with Facebook and texting.  Instead of their social day ending at the end of the school day, many Jr. High and high school students spend hours on texting and Facebook trying to stay connected.  This can led to problems with stress, anxiety and cyber bullying.

 Cornell University psychologist Nancy M. Wells PhD.  studied the benefits of kids connecting to nature and playing outside.  This research found that the more kids spent outdoors in nature the better they functioned both cognitively and emotionally.  The kids who spent less time in front of screens and more time outside playing and exploring,  showed better concentration, focus and behavior in school, increased ability to cope with stress and were more effective learners.  Kids who spent more time outdoors were more physically fit as kids and adults.  Lastly, these kids were more likely to take an interest in caring for the Earth as both kids and adults.

So what new rules can families put into place to help unplug from the screens and plug into nature?  Here are some suggestions to consider.

1. Setting a time limit on screen time (this includes mom and dad).
2. Jr. High and High school students turn the phone off and give to a parent at 8pm.
3. Weather permitting, family walks or outside time for at least 30 minutes a day.
4. Pick one day a month where everyone completely unplugs and spends the day outside.
5. Have a family picnic where no electronics are allowed and everyone has to communicate face to face.  
6. Plant a garden in your yard.

Kids and adults will benefit from connecting to nature.  Give it a try and see what improvements you see in your family!

Maggie Bagley is a licensed clinical social worker who has extensive experience working with children with Autism, ADHD, anxiety and behavioral disorders. She is a therapist and owner at One Counseling and Wellness.

Get A Life!

I know that most days I am not sure what I have accomplished. Between working, dinners, laundry, cleaning, dishes, running kids to and from school and activities by the end of the day I feel like the accomplishment was making it through it.

The days fly by and before I know it, the weekend has arrived. Weekends are full of grocery runs, errands that never got done during the week and getting set up for the next week. Two full days of catching up from the week behind and setting up for the week a head.

When week after week of this pile up, I start thinking to myself....I need to get a life!

Than I start thinking about what living means? Is the laundry as important as time away with friends?

Balance in life is one of those things you always have to be working at. Like juggling balls in the air you always have to be looking and aware of where everything is.

This awareness clues you in to when things are out of balance. When you know things just don't "feel" right, when you are always tired, don't have the energy to go out and be social with people, when everything else is more important than you.

Having balance in life actually energizes you!

Don't make social things and hobbies one more box to check in your life.

1. Do you have a social outlet that you visit regularly?
2. Do you have a hobby you enjoy?
3. Do you take time for yourself?
4. Do you always have something planned to look forward to?

If the answers above are mostly "no" you need to get a life.

Life is not only something given to us but something that needs to be created and enjoyed. This is an on going process that needs to be evaluated and reworked. It is essential, not only for continued improvement in the quality of your life but for your overall well being and the well being of your family.


Jori Sparry is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Her expertise includes working with traumatic life events, post traumatic stress disorder, marital and family issues, blended family issues, divorce, infertility, families with multiples, depression, anxiety, and with military service members and their families.

Internet Safety

Kids and Internet Safety

As technology becomes an increasing part of all households, safety and monitoring the internet becomes an important role for parents.  Kids no longer need a computer to get on-line, as they can access the internet through their phones, gaming devices and Ipods.   Ninety percent of kids ages 8-16 have been exposed to pornography on the internet, most of the time while using the internet for homework.  Curiosity often keeps them exploring.  Thirty-five percent of teen boys and eight percent of teen girls have intentionally visited sexually inappropriate sites.  Pornography has lasting affects on kids.  It changes their outlook of healthy sexual relationships.  For boys, attitudes toward women changed.  Kids often become more aggressive and develop sexually dysfunctional attitudes.  The human brain does not fully develop until early adulthood. By viewing pornography, adolescents are changing the structure of their brain, expanding pathways that will never go away and can be cued many years later.  

It is important for parents to talk with their kids about healthy sexuality.  There are numerous programs that can be placed on your computer to block inappropriate sites.  Parents can also make monitoring internet usage easier by keeping the computer in a central location in the home.  Programs are currently being developed which can monitor internet usage on cell phones.  Pornography and sexuality can be a difficult topic for parents to discuss; however, by ignoring the problem it may only get worse and has the possibility of developing into an addiction kids will not know how to handle.  

Alicia Bell is a licensed professional counselor who has extensive experience working with children and adults with sexual addictions. She is a therapist at One Counseling and Wellness.

Is massage therapy right for you?

Is massage therapy right for you?

You have a pain in your shoulder. You have heard about massage therapy and the success stories but don’t know if it is right for you. 

What is massage therapy is?

Massage is defined as the manipulating of superficial and deeper layers of muscles and connective tissues using various techniques. 

What does that even mean?

Massage involves working and acting on the body with pressure – structured, unstructured, stationary or moving – tension, motion or vibration, done manually or with mechanical aids. Target tissues may include muscles, tendons, ligaments, fascia, joints and other connective tissues.  

Now that you have an idea of what massage is, you schedule an appointment but realize there are different types of massage. 

Which one should you get?

Here is a list of the different types of massage One Counseling and Wellness offers.

Swedish Massage- The most common type of massage is swedish massage. It involves long, kneading strokes with light or firm pressure, rhythmic tapping strokes on topmost layers of muscles. This is also combined with movement of the joints. By relieving muscle tension, swedish massage can be both relaxing and energizing. It can even help after an injury.

Deep Tissue Massage- Deep tissue massage is a type of massage that focuses on the muscles located below the surface of the top muscles. Deep tissue massage is often recommended for individuals who experience consistent pain, people who are involved in heavy physical activity (such as athletes) or clients who have sustained physical injury. It is not uncommon for receivers of deep tissue massage to have their pain replaced with a new muscle ache for a day or two.  Though less rhythmic than other types of massage, deep tissue massage can be quite therapeutic -- relieving chronic patterns of tension and helping with muscle injuries, such as back sprain.

Sports Massage- Developed to help with muscle systems used for a particular sport, sports massage uses a variety of approaches to help athletes in training -- before, during or after sports events. You might use it to promote flexibility and help prevent injuries.  It can also help muscle strains, aiding healing after a sports injury.

Chair Massage- Chair massage is a 15-minute massage done while you are seated, fully clothed in a portable, specially designed massage chair.  This massage involves massaging your neck, shoulders, back, arms and hands. You get the regular benefits of a swedish massage but in a shorter time frame.

Pregnancy Massage- During pregnancy, your body goes through major changes. Pregnancy massage can help with these changes by reducing stress, decreasing arm and leg swelling, and relieving muscle and joint pain. Massage may be particularly helpful during a time when medication and other medical options may be more limited. 

Hot Stone Massage- In a hot stone of massage, the therapist places warmed stones on certain areas of the body, such as acupressure points. The stones may be used as massage tools or be temporarily left in place. Used along with other massage techniques, hot stones can be quite soothing and relaxing as they transmit heat deep into the body.

Now knowing the different forms of massages we offer you can make the decision on which one you want to try. Whichever form you chose just remember we are here to make you feel comfortable and feel better. 

Melissa Foster is a licensed massage therapist; she is part of the Wellness team at One.

Cabin Fever?

SURVIVING THE WINTER WITH LITTLE ONE’S

I have three young (ages 8, 5, and 3) spirited children.  By spirited, I mean I am really sorry if you ever have or ever do find yourself in line with us at the local Walmart checkout line!  

This time of year can be challenging for parents of young kids.  Christmas is over, you are broke and it is about to get extremely cold.  All of you will be catching not only real fevers but worse…CABIN FEVER!

So how can you prepare to stay sane in the dead of winter between being trapped inside, administering does of Tylenol and antibiotics and listening to the sounds of incessant coughing all night?  A little preparation can go a long way.  It is a horrible feeling to finally get your kids to bed and think we yelled and screamed all day or we did nothing but watch TV. 

Here are some tips to keeping it together during the Winter months.

1. Novelty goes a long way.  Find some time to go to a store, Walmart, Target or Michaels. First purchase, a rubber maid container.  Fill it with cheap items…shaving cream, finger paint, string, beads, pipe cleaners, tape, solo cups, cookie mix, frosting, play doh, new board games, pasta, glue and any other items that are on sale that look interesting or fun.  This bin will need to stay up high and out of reach.  It comes out when everyone is about to go crazy and you pick a fun activity to do.  Your kids will love it and you can pat yourself on the back for getting through a tough afternoon without turning on the TV or turning into momzilla.
2. For those days when you just HAVE to get out of the house…here are a few low to no cost ideas.  
1. The local library-free
2. Indoor pool
3. Sledding
4. Winter nature hike 
5. Building snowmen
6. Trip to the children’s museum in Bloomington
7. McDonalds Playland (if you are ok with germs)
8. Bowling
3. TV and electronics are not totally evil, sometimes when everyone is just tired or sick a PJ day on the couch may be the trick.  Veggie Tales videos seem to entertain all ages in our house.  

If you find that everyone has some energy but it is too nasty out to go to the gym some Just Dance or Wii Fit is a really great option.  In our house we like to just put on some fun music and have a dance a thon.

1. Other indoor activity ideas
1. Charades
2. Eye Spy
3. Simon Says
4. Build a fort
5. Indoor Obstacle course or relay races
6. Duck Duck Goose
7. Hide and Seek
8. Baking
2. Parents need breaks from their kids.  Some of us more than others.  This has nothing to do with being a good or bad parent.  We all have different tolerance levels for noise, chaos and parenting demands.  Find a friend who has similar needs and see if you can take turns having some alone time.  Play dates can help entertain your kids too and allow you to get a couple of things done.  If funds allow, get a baby sitter every couple of weeks and go out alone

Lastly, remember your house does not need to be spotless.  Get done what needs to get done and then get on the floor or sit at the kitchen table and talk, play, create, have fun with your kids.  This is the key to building an open relationship with them.

Maggie Bagley is a licensed clinical social worker who has extensive experience working with children with Autism, ADHD, anxiety and behavioral disorders. She is a therapist and owner at One Counseling and Wellness.